silent girl... i remember you

Help me somebody, please.
There's questions that need answering and cuddles that need giving and somebody needs to shake me and make me talk cause this mute girl is just cruising along for the ride... But I've been on this one before, almost everyday last year. And I didn't enjoy it enough to be doing it all over again.
Go home class, go home.
Maybe I don't have a home to go to, perhaps this hallway with the gray carpet and green walls is my home. What if I told you this was where I belong, that I can't leave?
What would you do then? Would you still send me home? 'Cause I'm not sure where I'm meant to be going right now so I'm just sitting on the gray carpet trying to make myself invisible. I've lost my words, what do I have to do to lose my body? What's the trick here?
But if I have no voice then nothing is going to be resolved. A year on the gray carpet, my back against the green wall.
Speak up,
This isn't your home kid.
This is an Institution.
Where do you belong?

Tell us something about yourselves, just a little something, a sentence. Who are you? Why are you here? God is that all it takes to break my well measured muteness? Shit, am I that easy to crack? Well, perhaps, maybe now that barrier has been broken I'll be able to sing from the rooftops. Maybe I can talk to someone, someone I don't already know, I wouldn't mind that. Cos loneliness is gun and all but I'm starving for something a little bit more.
Make me an offer,
tell me what you want from me
what are you afraid of?







Dear Stranger,

i love you
Today you were eyes, eyes carrying big dark bags with them, like the rings of Saturn. Your dreaded head leaning against the elevator doors. I saw you as I entered, I was in my silent world of music, thoughts and secrets.
I saw in your eyes undisguised curiosity, I felt a moment of connection. What did you see? What did you see when you looked at me? me and my alphabet bracelet, my shaggy hair perched comically on my head like a little bird.
Perhaps you and this fowl being had engaged in some sort of communication, did my bird tell you a secret? What does this bird know anyway?
I am the silent girl, the mute one who has lost her voice and her way, and is unsure how to find either. Did you see that in my face? Did my bird tell you where it is? It's not fair that my bird can speak to you while I can say nothing.

Help me?
(L)